Friday 12 September 2008

I Remember


I drempt last night of him, of my baby, my soul mate.
I dream less frequently of him now, after nearly 3 years, but it still gives me the same feeling, that slightly sick, slightly happy feeling of being close to you again. It wasnt a sexual dream, I think we were shopping, its usually the mundane things you remember, not the moments of intense passion or happiness. But it got me thinking of you. Got me remembering of how it was with you, my first, and, i wished, my last. It inspired me to write...

"Your fingers caress my flesh as if they would push through it, as if they sought to enter my skin, to touch my soul and never let go. Your mouth eats at mine as if you would breathe your last breath from me. Such urgency I have never know, never understood till now. Never been a part of till now. Its not that I want you in me, thats not enough. I want to be part of you, flesh melded into flesh, spirits entwined, pressed so close that we are only One, moving together, living together, dying together. If only"

And how I've grown since then. How my apetites have changed. How responsible I now know you were for bringing my true self, my true passions and desires out of me. Just for being you. How much fun we would have had exploring them, understanding them. I hope this makes you happy, cos it certainly makes me smile that old wicked smile of mine.

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